28.1.2006

Crash course on gender dependent English

Jos menet naisesi/miehesi luo, älä unohda ruokaa (Kaura). Lisäksi tarvitset käyttökelpoisen sanakirjan. Ohessa englannikielinen sukupuoliriippuvainen sanakirja (muokattu hieman kyberavaruudessa leviävästä).

WOMEN'S ENGLISH:
1. Yes = No
2. No = Yes
3. Maybe = No
4. We need = I want..
5. I am sorry = You'll be sorry
6. We need to talk = You're in trouble
7. Sure, go ahead = You'll be in trouble
8. Do what you want = You are already in trouble
9. I am not upset = I am upset, you insensitive moron!
10. You're certainly attentive tonight = Is sex all you ever think about?

MEN'S ENGLISH:
1. I am hungry = I am hungry
2. I am sleepy = I am sleepy
3. I am tired = I am tired
4. Nice dress = Nice arse/tits!
5. I love you = I want to have sex!
6. I am bored = Let's have sex!
7. May I have this dance? = Do you want to have sex?
8. Can I call you sometime? = Do you want to have sex later?
9. Do you want to go to movies? = So, you don't want to have sex yet?
10. Can I take you out to dinner? = Do you want to have sex after a burger and a couple of beers?
11. I don't think those shoes go with that outfit = I'm gay

Ei kommentteja: